Thursday, May 29, 2008

Lactaid.....

As we leave Cleveland I reflect on the great time that we had here. An exciting baseball game, the shenanigans at the science museum, the inspiring rock n roll hall of fame, and a great pizza dinner. 

We also probably just had the best accommodations of our trip. We stayed at the Fleshmans, my parents friends house. We arrived at 10:30pm to the smell of fresh brownies and cookies courtesy of Carla the mom, and Tamar, the daughter. After we watched the Celtics pull out the win against the Pistons, we had a intense row sham for beds. Marshall and I won, with the prize of sharing a huge (insert streaks' voice) king size bed. So huge (again insert streaks'  pronunciation) that we both spread out and could not touch each other and so comfy that we slept in until 10:30. Streaks got the couch and Eli, the 4th place finisher, slept on the carpeted floor. In the morning after we all took a refreshing shower (together.....? maybe) Carla had breakfast and the paper waiting. While reading the funnies we gorged ourselves with scrum-shish bagels, lox, tomatoes, onions, cereal, toped of with some fruit. 

As we left the house we got distracted by the Fleshman's basketball hoop and played a not so quick game of cat/dog/mat/hip. Unfortunately I lost and now have to DD the next time we need one. I blame my loss on the nerf ball we used. It was too light for my powerful muscular arms and could not get the right touch. 

Now back to the title of my post. Two days ago, I would say roughly around 12:31 pm in upstate New York , we all had a rumbling in our tummies. As we took out Eli's sandwiches, that he tirelessly slaved over until the wee hours of the night before we left, I went into my bag to search for my lactaid pills as the sandwiches had cheese on them. Unfortunately they were not there....I looked again and again and again and could not find them. I knew exactly what pocket I put them in and was perplexed why they were not there. As a result I missed out on Pizza last night, and have been a little bloaty and constipated from the cheese in Eli's sandwiches and cream cheese from breakfast the following day. Luckily for my fellow journeymen I did not consume enough dairy products for my flatulents to become smelly. It was not until this morning when I finally found a store that carried lactaid, the third one I tried in two days, did I find out what had happened to my mysteriously vanishing lactaid. It turns out that a fellow housemate, who I will not mention because of the severity of the crime and because I will not give him the satisfaction, took my lactaid before the trip as a prank. While I will admit it was funny, annoying is also another good word to describe it. 

On a more serious note, marshall just destroyed streaks in the alphabet game. He finished while streaks was still only on X. We are on the road to Chicago, and in six short hours we will be there.

-The not gassy, bloaty, constipated,
Dash

5 comments:

Unknown said...

must say i have been chuckling almost peeing in my pants over the blogs..humorous, wealth of information and a damn good read..the bottle is passe eli try peeing into a diaper it absorbs more and the neck of the bottle could be a tad restrictive..ouch..carry on oh journeymen..be well and try to stay clear of the dark side..it can be slippery!!! with love mommasita lactaid.

Unknown said...

Just saying hi to everyone and congrats for graduating..I missed coming out to Boston and partying but have a wild trip across America.. Drew I hope you brought your lactate pills...that would suck for the rest of the crew..Well have a blast and see you soon..love the little brother
Zac

Unknown said...

Duck

It was all a Dream said...

This post is a 9.5 on the unintentional comedy scale.

Mass Exodus Journeymen said...

nope it was intentional